the coldness

i am cold. literally and figuratively.

Somehow this weird phenom has settled in and i am not really sure how to address it.

Tama ba? Naiisip kominsan baka hormonal changes lang to ( like that uber-emotional response to Van Gogh's Starry Night) or maybe it's just the darn weather. I really haven't been able to adjust to the weather --- i feel like i'm forever stuck in this freezer called Chicago. Somebody heat me up... uh, that didn't sound right. My bad. LOL

Chicago impressions

Nobody told me it was gonna be COLD in Chicago.

It's pretty, pristine and yes, COLD. It snowed last night, which delayed my flight into O'Hare by two hours. Argh. Thank God Jason has his car already...otherwise i'll be trudging down through snow and commuting to Godknowswhere...

So here i am, typing away on Jason's lovely MAC (ooh, i want one too!) while trying to "make most" of my morning. I've been trying to download a MAC version of Photoshop so i can get going with a project (anybody? help??? please!???) while figuring out what to wear (after all, i came here with "light winter clothes" --- doesn't necessarily tranlate to the appropriate ones :-P) before i step out.

Ahhh.

This whole East coast/ midwest trip is somewhat tiring and stressful, i gotta admit. I'm not saying i'm not loving every inch of it, but i do wish that the emotional aspect of this trip can be kept to a minimum. I am going nuts trying to figur emyself out after all these encounters and wondering if i'm losing my mind in the process...

Still, there is hope.

While i try not to reminisce too much of the past, i try to figure out what to do with my "future".

For now i'll just try to figure the warmest yet most stylish clothes i have --- before i freeze to death.

the city that is NY

it's odd to think that NY can change people, but having been here for about a week now, i can honestly say that it can. And it does. The city can literally eat you up alive, if you let it... this is not to dissuade me from thinking that NY is THE place be in -- i am somewhat bereft that i will be missing out on some good partyng and some of the fabulous sights and sounds that comprise this amazingly diverse, fantastic place....the people, the subways, the haunts, theparties like such fun, and i'd hate to be getting out just when the season's just starting.

Oh well. Take the bad with the good, as they say. In this case, i will. :-P

Ahh, ce'st la vie.

+ + +

I still love NY.

+ + +

serendipity?

Siguro nga, it had to be.

Isipin ko man na hindi pwede, o kaya tanungin ko man sairili ko kung bakit nangyari ang nangyari, mukhang ngayon, hindi mangyayari ang pagkakataon na ito muli. O di ba, ang surreal.... LOL

Masaya nako at nakapagusap muli tayo. Ang tadhana naman o, may pagkapilyo talaga minsan... Ngayon, di ko na inaalala ang kahapon o bukas. Sa ngayon, di ko na muna iisipin ito. Sa mga pagkakataong ito, masaya na muna ako na makapiling ka at makausap ka muli na walang takot, walang sama ng loob, at walang katanungan kundi, san tayo gigimik? :-P

Siguro nga, It just had to be.... you.

hazel and lette!

lette_n_hazel
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

had a fab dinner with Hazel by Times Square last night! :-) It's so great to see her again... yummy food (chinese), great company in one of the greatest cities in the world, what mor ecan a gal ask for? :-)

Best Friends till the End

Best Friends till the End
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

(this is beginning to sound like a BFF series!) Got this in the mail recently from Kittee gurl --- thanks a bunch, hon! mwah! I'm missing you! :-) Awww, and she has our pics up too! :-)

Girlfriends

BFF (Best Friends Forever)
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

in times of happiness
and sorrows and grief
they give you some hope
and a a little bit of relief
you can count each one
to give you some love
be it a smile
some words or a hug
they comfort you with cheer
that's forever abound
or just be plain happy
with a margarita round!
With galpals like these
who needs to frown?
They keep you up and never down
Fabulous friends
despite all the strife
Are friends till the end
and treasures for life

at Edgar Allan Poe's grave

at Edgar Allan Poe's grave
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

AAAhhhh, Baltimore. Land of crabcakes, Sleepless in Seattle and yes, Edgar Allan Poe. :-) Here's to you, o great one

birthday thanks

thank_you_card
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

kudos to the gang for giving a wonderful party! :-D mwah mwah mwah! *hugs*

The bottom Line

Believe it or not, while a friend you've thought of in only the most strictly platonic of ways has done their very best to keep things that way ... well, that natural sexuality that oozes out of your every pore doesn't make it easy to do. They may be gearing up to make that announcement now, but if you aren't ready to hear it, for whatever reason, do what you do best -- that skillful sidestep.


Oooh, this is interesting.... :-)

on a birthday break

breaking off the bliogging for now, gonna enjoy my birthday week. cheerios! :-)

*blows candle, eats cake* yum!

birthday gift

birthday gift
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Got this lovely scarf in the mail today --- a wonderful present from Grandma Margaret and Grandpa Jim! Home made and very warm and fuzzy, it's just too sweet!!! :-) Thanks for remembering my birthday!!! *kisses and hugs*

lost in transition

ruminating
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

roaming the streets of LA....

freelancing blahs

During my stint as a "freelancer", i realized a sad reality: you're only as good as your networking skills. As much as i hate to admit it, one cannot freely express one's self and make a profit unless one is exposed and (argh) connected to those who have the money and the ability to make things happen. (Oh god, my jaded personality is kicking in!)

Perhaps i still hold on to an idealism that with true talent, you can make it to the top. Expose your work, and as they say, they will come. *sigh* I guess networking prods it a little more... then again, it makes me question everything: how far can you take it and "network" without truly selling out? :-P

the future?

this makes me question if i should go with my plans for an MA in SF or not....

while this makes me think twice about staying in RP.

Hmmm.

a lesson from the gals...

Sex and the City Love Lessons

1) Lesson 1 - You are not easily not forgotten. Let him find you when HE'S READY. The message - Don't make excuses for man's bad behavior.

2) Any guy who dumps you wasn't good enough for you. The message - It's not your fault if a guy doesn't like you.

3) Life is hard enough without sharing it with someone difficult. The message - No matter how much a guy spoils you he still needs to be kind to you and share things with you.

4) You deserve to be with someone who gives you his best and is nice to you all the time. The message - Harry never made Charlotte doubt his love. The man should always try to give you his best and never give you reasons to doubt.

5) When a man says he can't be monogamous, believe him. The message - He's just not that into you if he's cheating on you.

6) There is a guy out there who wants to marry you. The message - A lot of women say, " The guys I like never like me." What about the guy that does like you????

7) No matter how hard your heart is aching over a broken heart you can always count on your friends to be there for you.

8) ALWAYS BE OPEN TO UNEXPECTED POSSIBILITIES.


P.S. Its from this week's current issue of US Weekly! I hope all you ladies get a lesson or two on love. Although realism is good to always have it doesn't hurt to be OPTIMISTIC sometimes =)

it's raining in LA???

Just when i thought things couldn't get any worse...

it rains.

Not only did this make the day colder, gloomier and more,well, depressing, i can't get out. (then again, i have no money to really go around anywa, but that's besides the point...)

Yeuch. (make face)

What's worse about getting stuck at home with nothing to do? Getting stuck at home with nothing to eat. ...sigh. I wanted to make pancakes from scratch to cheer me up, but the milk was old (Eeeow!!!) and stinky. I wnated to make sandwiches, but the bread was gone. Sigh. Settled for yogurt and dried fruit (uh, yummmy... i guess) Now all i can think about is pigging out on some good ol' Papa John's Pizza....

me and jackie

me and jackie2
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

yet another shot of me and my fab "sister" --- this was taken while havin' dinner @ Islands by Seal Beach.

sunday bloody sunday

i realized that yes, the weather is definitely getting cold-ER. I actually am scared of heading to the east coast now that i have had the taste of what 60 degrees felt like... brrr!

i need some warmth....dammit.

+ + +

Confound it! my 6flags plan was shattered with the "disappearance" of my cousin. *sigh* Settled for a movie with my other cousin, Ricky instead. The weather was bad anyway---scattered rain, cloudy skies, 20 degrees lower than usual. Well, at least the movie was funny --- Wallace and Gromit was pretty witty and quite entertaining, especially since they intersperesed a lot of adult humor into the details (imagine a stark naked Wallace holding a box to cover himself that read " contains nuts").

+ + +

on vacation

vacation
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

got this from postsecret.com --- quite befitting, don'tcha think? :-P

Life is one long self-help book

Consider the possibilities: how many times can one receive a self-help chain e-mail? I got this about three times this week (is this a weekly special or what?) Anyhoo, sarcasm aside, this actually made some sense to my system and so i shall (in lieu of forwarding AGAIN) post this up for all you people to read and ponder on:

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you..
2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
4.. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart
5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around
12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.


REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.

+ + +

Ironically, i, along with some friends, have been mulling over the same thoughts and related scenarios for the past few weeks and it's funny how these folks also got this email from someone they know (hahaha, call it divine intervention, perhaps?) Ahhh, life and its surprises! :-P

the good times are killing me... (Modest Mouse)

Lately the emotional rollercoaster that has been coursing through me is steadily slowing down --- why is that, i wonder? These past few days have launched me into a new panic attack, wherein i ask myself, Why the fuck is this all happening!?!!! Then again, that's just me...

Take for example, my saturday: My friends and i were at Melros Avenue checking out Crossroads and the other local "vintage" and secondhand stores around the area. We parked by the store itself and since it was early, decided to splurge on a smoothie (i mean splurge because the prices skyrocket along these areas, like, $5 for a smoothie!!?!!)

Anyhoo, we were hanging out the shop when a couple of cop cars pass by, their sirens whirling like mad. Next thing we know, two bomb squad cars passby. Thinking it was a movie being shot, we didn't take much note of it... until they started closing off an entire block of the street --- specifically, the block where we parked our car.

Yep, complete with flares, yellow ribbons and a dozen or so cops redirecting traffic, we got from the nice guy in blue that an unidentified package was left in the store across Crossroads and was being analyzed by the bomb squad as he spoke. People were in a near-panic mode as they anxiously waited for an explosion.

Now, this would have been really freakish had it not been the fact that this was in Hollywood. I think being in this specific setting made me less freaked out about it because, well, i keep expecting the cameras to appear and somebody to say "cut!" anytime soon. Alas, it was real, as they made us wait for about an hour and a half for them to safely say, "it's not a bomb, people!".

Hmmm. At least my saturday was quite interesting... and yes, i did what any normal tourist would do --- take pictures :-P

The so-called personality test

Your #1 Match: ESFP

The Performer You are a natural performer and happiest when you're entertaining others. A great friend, you are generous, fun-loving and optimistic. You love to laugh - and you like almost all people equally. You accept life as it is, and you do your best to make each day fantastic. You would make a good actor, designer, or counselor.

Your #2 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller! You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #3 Match: ESFJ

The Caregiver You are sympathetic and caring, putting friends and family first. A creature of habit, you prefer routines and have trouble with change. You love being in groups - whether you're helping people or working on a project. You are good at listening, laughing, and bringing out the best in people. You would make a great nurse, social worker, or teacher.

Your #4 Match: ISFP

The Artist You are a gifted artist or musician (though your talents may be dormant right now). You enjoy spending your free time in nature, and you are good with animals and children. Simply put, you enjoy bueaty in all its forms and live for the simple pleasures in life. Gentle, sensitive, and compassionate - you are good at recognizing people's unspoken needs. You would make a good veterinarian, pediatrician, or composer.

Your #5 Match: ENFJ

The Giver You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed. Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections. Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down. You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine. You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist.

What's Your Personality Type?

peace, y'all!

peace, y'all!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Hangin' with Carlo and Kimmy for the weekend! We went to watch CORPSE BRIDE at Universal Cinemas and pretty much hung out at their place in Glendale. Nakakmiss ang Blueridge gang! Wish you were here, jays! :-)

adieu Multiply

So my Multiply account is officially dead.


Alas, with all unexplained things in this world, including the Bermuda Triangle and The Yeti, it's gone... whoever pulled it out, well, that's your thing. Karma will deal with you.

Oh well. All things have their own twisted way of coming back.

So anyway, i've started a replacement blog for travel accounts here

revisiting SATC

Things have been quite "non-interesting" these days that i feel stuck. I don't really know what causes this uneasiness in me, but i was feeling that "funk", that weird inner cringe and i didn't know what to do about it. In need of some "woman talk" and all the positivism only the female sex can provide, I turn to viewing old episodes of SATC.

Sex and the City gave most women felt empowerment with the brazen and frank way Carrie and her girflriends approached the topic of sex, love and relationships. For me, it was the embodiment of what i wanted to feel --- safe and secure in my own sexuality, confident enough to move on without thinking too much about it, or regretting it. I secretly wanted to be a cool mix of Carrie's fashion chic, Samantha's devil-may-care attitude, Charlotte's naive yet romantic soul and Miranda's intellect.

Ahhh, tv. What you cannot have in real life, they put in stereotypes in shows.

Regardless of this, SATC gave me some pretty interesting insight on such subjects, and weird as it may seem, there were things that actually made sense (see previous posts re: SATC).

I wish life can be as easily read like these episodes. More to the point, i wish life will always have a happy ending, like they do (after all, Carrie got Mr. Big, didn't she?)

i got tagged!

WALA LANG: 20 People You Can Think Of Right Off Your Head
*these people aren't listed in any particular order...
so dont feel bad if you're number 20, or if you're not on the list at all*

01. Kitty
02. Mary
03. Jac
04. Jason
05. Melvin
06. Melissa
07. River
08. Jackie
09. Hectril
10. April
11. Abie
12. Justin
13. Haydee
14. Jasonic
15. Ann
16. Hazel
17. Pika
18. Roel
19. Mitzy
20. Ricky

How did you meet ..13?
>> in high school, through classroom assignments

What do you honestly think of 10?
>> my mom is really cool :-)

Have you ever liked 3?
>> Yeah, cos she's a strong woman :-)

Would 11 and 2 make a good couple?
>> nah, they're better off friends :-P

Do you think 12 is hot?
>> hehehe, i'd be biased he's my cuzin!

Who is 8 going out with?
>> her boyfriend

Is 9 a boy or a girl?
>> a boy.

When was the last time you talked to 5?
>> a couple of weeks back :-)

What is 1's favorite band?
>> nirvana --- ganun pa rin ba kits?

Does 2 have any siblings?
>>yeah, she's the youngest of five kids, i think...

Would you ever date 6?
>> yeah, if i was a lesbian... but since i'm not, girls night out na lang!

Would you ever date 7?
>> yup, on girls nights out!

Is 15 single?
>> nope

What is 19s last name?
>> Dorland

What does 17 look like?
>> the hottest momma in da hood!

What is 10's fantasy?
>> i dunno, and it's too weird ot ask my mom that!

Would 14 and 19 ever get together?
>> i dont think so...

What school does 16 go to?
>> UP FA - grad na sya.

What school does 1 go to?
>> UP CFA- grad na sya.

Where does 9 live?
>> at home

Would you make out with 13?
>> LOL --- i dont think so!

Are 5 and 6 best friends?
>> they dont know each other

Is 20 older than you?
>> nope, younger

Is 18 the sexiest person alive?
>> ob cors! :-) naks, roo, yung sweldo ko ha! ;-)

* tagging all them readers!!!

postcard series

postcard_06
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Been bored and pretty much trying to rant out through random artworks... whaddya think?

Ahhh...boredom can do much for a depressed gal...

missing

i find the most unlikely form of comfort from a letter.

Thank you for your kind words of wisdom, and strangely, though i never really said anything specific, you seemed to know what i was hinting at. You make my day a lot better with your hopeful outlook in life...


+ + +

I think missing someone is the worst kind of torture one can inflict on one's self.

This feels like a repeat of Sex and the City's "The Exquisite Pain" episode.

+ + +

makes you think....

A relationship offers a chance for you to be reborn -- if you want a new identity.

You thought you were done with hearing the confessions of your friends, since you've let them all know that you really can't be surprised at this point. Suddenly, however, someone has called to mention something they're feeling rather guilty about -- and now that you know, you're going to feel guilty about it, too. Your only option is to trust your instinct, which has only let you down when you haven't listened.


+ + +


Argh. My hormonal changes are f*cking up my intuition. Somebody help...

f*ckit

I promised myself it wouldn't be about you. I promised myself i'll protect my heart. I promised myself that if anything should happen, it will be because i wanted it to happen.

It took one call for my defenses to break down.

I don't want to explain myself to you anymore. You know how i feel about you. You know how all i want is to spend time with you. I understand the situation. I understand how things changed. Silly me. I forget that love does not conquer everything, it complicates it.

I want to be there for you. I want to be with you.

That's all there is to it for me.

And men say women are complicated... :-P

Hoo-boy....

The Bottom Line
Decisions teach us about ourselves. Remember your priorities, and this'll be easy.

In Detail
You were probably quite irritated with someone who deceived you recently, and remnants of those feelings could be hanging over your heart right now. If it's a friend who's responsible, you can make peace, but not until later tonight, after you've had the chance to do some detective work to prove to yourself that you're right to help. In the meantime, you'll have to endure at least one more conversation with the same person over the same issue before it's over. Oh, you can do it. You're tough.


+ + +


Yeah, right. Now all i have to figure out what my priorities really are...

Surreal world

After a not-so-interesting day i got a call from Dave, a fellow kababayan (he hails from the same province) and a nearby resident, who, as his voice hinted, was depressed as a depressed guy could be.

Girl trouble? thank goodness,no! I've had enough in my mind as it is to entertain troubles of the heart... :-P

Anyhoo, we schedule a "kapehan session" (a.k.a coffee and yosi) that night to talk about whatever's been bugging him. Turns out, his client boots him from a project he was so hoping to get for that evening. In the friday buzz of Cerritos' Starbucks, we digressed the WTF's of corporate America, living the American dream (not necessarily living it tho) and all the "what-the-hell-happened-to... " connections we had in the province.

Kewlness, fate hits him bigtime after a few hours or so... the client who ditched him earlier calls him up telling him to head out to the gig to take pics, ASAP. What do we do? He brings me home to change outfits, and we speed through the 710 to catch the gig.

Ahh, fate does have a twisted sense of humor....the 710 gets packed, apparently from road work caution (they blocked two lanes) ---not only that, we were low in gas, and have a possible chance of getting stranded in the freeway should we end up using it all. So the journey takes a detour into downtown LA in search of a gas station...again, where is a gas station when you need it!?!!

We finally find one, in the heart of a nearby suburb --- ahh, the gringos, the festive signs, the dark alleys nearby... the gas was cheap, but the place gave me goosebumps :-P We head up to Glendale where, while listening to The Killers, we missed the turn, leading us to a roundabout into the next exit.

At last we end up at the bar, where Dave pretty much goes around and do his "paparazzi" thing, while i mingle with the fil-ams, nodding to the beat and taking it all in. The scene was pretty happening, though it does give you a nostagic feel of Makati in the weekend (kinda like Mbassy or Il Ponti)..though i could do with all the "baduy" pick-up lines (that's what you get when you're a lone female without a posse of gals) from them kids. Got to hang with some fun, booze-lovin' kids who were living it up and takin pictures of everybody. Kudos to them folks --- Melissa, Angela and Ryan, as well as Sato! :-) They were pretty kewl... The booze was pretty expensive, but hey, it's better to be sober than drunk at these times :-P

The party was pretty happenin', a pretty fun way to spend a friday night... what began as a typical night turned out to be something quite...well, surreal :-)

driving lessons

Hard to believe, but i haven't had a driver's license since...forever. i never really thought much about it growing up. Suffice to say that while most kids growing up would dream of what car they would want to own, i was too busy thinking of other things.

My friends (well, most of them anyay) have their own cars now, and they prefer that to commuting, but really, who would want to drive in Manila? The chaos, the EDSA traffic, the bad officers, the expensive parking, the "guidelines" that are the traffic laws....who would want to?

Fast forward to the present: in LA, it is -- gasp!--- scandalous to not have your own car. Worse, it is almost as serious as having done a crime not to have a driver's license (well, in most circles anyway). Here, people expect you to drive, if not own a vehicle, and as most job requirements, you need to have your own transportation. So here i am, without knowledge or experience whatsoever in that field, readily commuting to brave through big, bad LA. People say i am commiting social suicide.

*sigh* In retrospect, i have to agree that to a certain degree they are right. After all, i am turning a year older soon, and well, i guess there just comes a time that you have to do the inevitable....

So i took the written driving exam yesterday. Big whooo-pee.

i have to admit, going through those lines, writing all the necessary paperwork, and pretty much answering those questions left me unsettled. All this for a measly piece of identification card? Hmmm.... it felt like forever, but finally i was done.

i passed.

Ok, admittedly, it felt good.

Now all i have to do is take one more test and i'm well... conformed to society.

Wish me luck :-P

feeling california

The recovery of my demise from a recent soul-searching experience resulted to nothing. I am, as i ever will be, still stuck in that lousy game of "what the hell do i do with my life?" phase... i think every individual has this moment one time or another in his or her life, perhaps mine just goes in circles. No momentous discovery or brilliant "aha!" moment here, just the strange "hmmm..." still hanging...

This is not to say that i am not enjoying my time here. After all, this IS LA... the land of opportunity and all that. I think the whole quarter life crisis is getting to me (Yes folks, i will be officially a year older come next month). *sigh*

I wonder if Carrie had days like these.

I'm missing having an apartment of my own, working like mad in a stimulating environment (though be it underpaid and overworked) and still have time to ruminate with friend over tea, coffee or cocktails (margaritas, please!) These things seem to be a million lightyears away now...

This is what California does to me.

I wonder how NY would be like....

hahahaha!!!!! this is pretty kewl....

You scored as Lord Voldemort. Evil and power hungry, you strike fear into the hearts of all wizard kind. Lord Voldemort 75% Hermione Granger 75% Sirius Black 70% Ron Weasley 70% Albus Dumbledore 70% Severus Snape 65% Draco Malfoy 65% Harry Potter 65% Ginny Weasley 60% Remus Lupin 55% Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...? created with QuizFarm.com

the zen of Calvin and Hobbes

Calvin: What's a pronoun?

Hobbes: It's a noun that lost its amateur status.

sumthing happeee.....

so they say...

Ah, the game of love. Sometimes you roll the dice and you get to pass 'Go' and collect a sweet chunk of change. Other times, it seems like the only rule is there are no rules and it's every person for him or herself. You're in more of a limbo state right now, and not really sure which way to turn. Rather than trying to figure out a course of action at once, why not figure out what you want first, and then act from there?

great. I figured that out and i'm still stuck in limbo. *sigh*

+ + +

Happy birthday to my grandmama! Mwah!!!

+ + +

oh yeah, belated happy birthdays to Mark L., Onelski and AbieGurl... not to mention Toti, LizzTrinity, Jalski and Don S. :-) Did i miss anyone? ANyhoo, my memory's getting all fried from all this useless worrying... ARGH...

+ + +

Somebody get me a drink. or two. I need something to dull the pain.

+ + +

death in the family

tv deaths worth mentioning....Leave it to tv writers and directors to come up with some amazing deaths. Scoring through tv for most of my time now, i have come to think of some of my fave casts as family soothing me through my boring nights at home.

hehhe...

+ + +

a call can make or break your day

In my case, it totally did make it.... *happy hearts*

just beautiful (thanks Kitty)

someone out there is meant to be the love of your life, your best friend, your soulmate, the one you can tell your dreams to. he'll smile at you when you tell him, but he'll never laugh at your heart. he'll brush the hair out of your eyes and send you flowers when you least expect it. he'll call you to tell you goodnight before you get into bed or just because he is thinking about you. he'll be bursting to talk to you each morning just to hear the sound of your voice. he'll look into your eyes and tell you that you are the most beautiful girl he has ever seen and for the first time in your life ... you'll believe it

:-) this made me smile. Thanks, gurl *hug*

stuck

music video code by urbnmix.net
destinys child - emotion

peace, y'all!

peace, y'all!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

we're bored... so camwhores that we are, my cousin Justin and I decided to pose for the cam and do what we like to call "the ghetto thang".

hmmm....

hmmm....
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

uh, we're running out of poses....

justin teachin me how it's done

justin teachin me how it's done
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

ok, ok....

doin' the peace thang

doin' the peace thang
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

ok, i'm not doin this right....

uh, yeah!

uh, yeah!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

ode #27

Reach out for that smile
you always have handy
to elevate your mood
still
your eyes betray you
and you do everything to distract them from looking
You look to busy yourself
from thinking too much
and you pick up the clutter of your room
hoping that you can pick up
the clutter in your life
just like that
silence
you yearn and fear it
it is both a friend and an enemy
keeping your thoughts close
yet turning them against you
'there is more to life than this'
like an incessant itch
you find yourself mouthing these words
like a voice that cannot be heard
Smile, you are happy
or so you keep telling yourself
Collapse into the sunset
they never know what you are thinking
anyway...

InDiE Rockurrrr....

You Are an Indie Rocker!

You are in it for the love of the music... And you couldn't care less about being signed by a big label. You're all about loving and supporting music - not commercial success. You may not have the fame and glory, but you have complete control of your career.

What Kind of Rocker Are You?

:-)

urock
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Don't You (Forget ABout Me)

Hey, hey, hey ,hey
Ohhh...

Won't you come see about me?
I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby


Tell me your troubles and doubts
Giving me everything inside and out and
Love's strange so real in the dark
Think of the tender things that we were working on


Slow change may pull us apart
When the light gets into your heart, baby


Don't You Forget About Me
Don't Don't Don't Don't
Don't You Forget About Me


Will you stand above me?
Look my way, never love me
Rain keeps falling, rain keeps falling
Down, down, down


Will you recognise me?
Call my name or walk on by
Rain keeps falling, rain keeps falling
Down, down, down, down


Hey, hey, hey, hey
Ohhhh.....


Don't you try to pretend
It's my feeling we'll win in the end
I won't harm you or touch your defenses
Vanity and security


Don't you forget about me
I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby
Going to take you apart
I'll put us back together at heart, baby


Don't You Forget About Me
Don't Don't Don't Don't
Don't You Forget About Me


As you walk on by
Will you call my name?
As you walk on by
Will you call my name?
When you walk away


Or will you walk away?
Will you walk on by?
Come on - call my name
Will you all my name?


I say :
La la la...


a tribute to The Breakfast Club and Family Guy

tag by psychicpants

INSTRUCTIONS: List 10 things that bring you a moment of joy.

1. learning something new everyday
2. ice cream on a cold day
3. blueberries and cereal in the morning
4. vitamin Water!
5. Prendz!!
6. having a really good conversation with someone i like
7. tasting new food!
8. gals night with a pitcher of margaritas
9. really good music
10.travelling

INSTRUCTIONS: List 3 things that bug you, things that others may find trivial.

1. people trying to impress everybody else (mayabang!!!)
2. pets dressed as people
3. crappy bathrooms

racing

Inexplicably fervent
My heart races with the rush
along with the fragments of thoughts
of you
perhaps i can affix myself
to steadier ground
perhaps i can
lose control
another time
perhaps i can
stop the undeniable tension
that distracts me from everyday life
a temporary lapse of memory
that causes me to
stop myself from doing the everyday
perhaps i can resist the futile existence
that i call my life...
will you help me with this conundrum?
i often wonder the
many instances of "perhaps" in this
so-called existence
we once called my life
I should stop this now
while i can
constantly i find myself
staring into the nothingness like the steady post
that remains steadfast amidst the change
where is the solace that i once had...
let me stop from thinking
let me stop from living

I heart Adam!!!

I heart Adam!!!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Watching the NFL Kickoff concert was the coolest thing i've done for the week --- not only did we get pit passes (as in, 2 feet away from the stage), we got NFL goodies, fantastic performances by some of the hottest musicians and best of all, it was FREE!!!

Can you tell i am so totally crushing on Maroon 5's Adam? Ooh-lala! Hearing him sing "Sunday Morning" oh-so-heavenly is just the perfect way to distract myself from all this emotional hullabaloo i've been experiencing the past few days...*sigh* God, i just love that song...

insane in the membrane...

SHAKE IT OFF
Mariah Carey

I gotta shake you off
Cause the loving ain't the same
And you keep on playing games
Like you know I'm here to stay
I gotta shake you off
Just like the Calgon commercial
I really gotta get up outta here
And go somewhere
I gotta shake you off
Gotta make that move
Find somebody who
Appreciates all the love I give
Boy I gotta shake you off
Gotta do what's best for me
Baby and that means I gotta
Shake you off

By the time you get this message
It's gonna be too late
So don't bother paging me
Cause I'll be on my way
See I grabbed all my diamonds and clothes
Just ask your mama she knows
You're gonna miss me, baby
Hate to say I told you so
Well at first I didn't know
But now it's clear to me
You would cheat with all your freaks
And lie compulsively
So I packed up my Louis Vuitton
Jumped in your ride and took off
You'll never ever find a girl
Who loves you more than me

[chorus]
I gotta shake you off
Cause the loving ain't the same
And you keep on playing games
Like you know I'm here to stay
I gotta shake you off
Just like the Calgon commercial
I really gotta get up outta here
And go somewhere
I gotta shake you off
Gotta make that move
Find somebody who
Appreciates all the love I give
Boy, I gotta shake you off
Gotta do what's best for me
Baby, and that means I gotta
Shake you off

[bridge]
I gotta shake, shake, shake, shake, shake it off [repeat]

I found out about a gang
Of your dirty little deeds
With this one and that one
By the pool, on the beach, in the streets
Heard y'all was
Hold up, my phone's breakin' up
I'ma hang up and call the machine right back
I gotta get this off of my mind
You wasn't worth my time
So, I'm leaving you behind
Cause I need a real love in my life
Save this recording because
I'm never coming back home
Baby, I'm gone
Don't cha know

[chorus]
I gotta shake you off
Cause the loving ain't the same
And you keep on playing games
Like you know I'm here to stay
I gotta shake you off
Just like the Calgon commercial
I really gotta get up outta here
And go somewhere
I gotta shake you off
Gotta make that move
Find somebody who
Appreciated all the love I give
Boy, I gotta shake you off
Gotta do what's best for me
Baby, and that means I gotta
Shake you off

Stuck in my brain

GIRL
Beck

I saw her, yea I saw her
With a black tongue tied round the roses
A fist pounding on a vending machine
Toy diamond ring stuck on her finger
With a noose she could hang from the sun
And point it out with the dark sunglasses
Walking crooked down the beach
She spits in the sand
Where their bones are bleaching

And I know I'm gonna steal her eye
She doesn't even know what's wrong
And you know I'm gonna make it die
Take her where her soul belongs
Know I'm gonna steal her eye
Nothing that I wouldn't try
My cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl
My cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl

I saw her, yea I saw her
With her hands tied back
Her rags are burnin'
Calling out from a landfilled life
Scrawling her name up on the ceiling
Throw a coin in the fountain of dust
White noise, her ears are ringing
Got a ticket for my midnight hanging
Throw a bullet from a freight train leaving

And I know I'm gonna steal her eye
She doesn't even know it's wrong
And you know I'm gonna make it die
Take her where her soul belongs
Know I'm gonna steal her eye
Nothing that I wouldn't try
My cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl
My cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl

Hey my cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl
My cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl
My cyanide girl
Hey my cyanide girl

frantic

i wish i can stop time. It's insane these days, everything seems to happen so fast,e specially things you don't want to happen... ironically, when you least expect it, you end up dazed and stunned into time warp, gettinglost in a moment that is either too depressing to do anything, or too painful to even manage a smile... People seem to think it's poor time management, but i call it poor adjustment to change....

I dunno. perhaps i am resistant to change, but then again, who isn't? Just when yo think everything is ok, life throws you a hurdle so big you wanna just curl up and die.

Fuck this world sometimes.

random questions

Sometimes you wish you can change things in an instant. Sometimes you believe things will be different. But then things seldom do, and you end up disappointed. And hurt. And angry. At everything...at yourself, for believing. ...believing so much you thought it's already there...

Do you let go because you are afraid of the hurt? Or do you let go becuase you don't want to anymore?

Sometimes you wish they can see it the way you do... perhaps they can understand why you feel the way you do.

Is it too much, do you think, to feel this way? Change is a constant, but don't you want to believe that some things stay the same? Like patience, and hope, and love...

Do you still hold on because you don't wanna let go? Or do you still hold on because you believe?

happy labor day weekend!

take time to stop and smell the flowers.


+ + +


I miss you sweetie

Modern Cool Nerd? Natch!

and they say i was uncool... :-P

Modern, Cool Nerd 65 % Nerd, 52% Geek, 39% Dork

For The Record: A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia. A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one. A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions. You scored better than half in Nerd and Geek, earning you the title of: Modern, Cool Nerd. Nerds didn't use to be cool, but in the 90's that all changed. It used to be that, if you were a computer expert, you had to wear plaid or a pocket protector or suspenders or something that announced to the world that you couldn't quite fit in. Not anymore. Now, the intelligent and geeky have eked out for themselves a modicum of respect at the very least, and "geek is chic." The Modern, Cool Nerd is intelligent, knowledgable and always the person to call in a crisis (needing computer advice/an arcane bit of trivia knowledge). They are the one you want as your lifeline in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (or the one up there, winning the million bucks)! Congratulations! Also, you might want to check out some of my other tests if you're interested in either of the following: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Professional Wrestling Love & Sexuality Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 71% on nerdiness You scored higher than 75% on geekosity You scored higher than 64% on dork points

Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on Ok Cupid

another sarbee (thanks, kitz)

COMPLETE THIS PHRASE: "I COULD BE.."
: the one. (haha!)

2. WHAT IS THE WALLPAPER ON YOUR CELLPHONE?
: cingular logo (ay, baduy!)

3.DID YOU GET ENOUGH SLEEP LAST NIGHT?
: not really. I kept wishing i was though.

4.FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THIS MORNING WHEN YOU WOKE UP?
: "oh sh*t, ang sakit ng singaw ko"

5.WHAT DO YOU HAVE AT YOUR BEDSIDE?
: my cellfone

6. EVER TRIED TO SKIP MEAL?
: yeah

7. GRILLED OR FRIED?
: grilled

8. WHAT MAKES YOU UNIQUE TO OTHERS?
: my impeccable lack of timing...

9. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?
: only when i'm by myself

10. FAVORITE HANGOUT?
: right now? anywhere that i can hang without any complications...

11. PEOPLE YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT?
: my family, friends and right now, muh beybi...

12. FIRST THING YOU WILL BUY IF GIVEN 1 THOUSAND DOLLARS?
: a ticket. 

13. FAVORITE SONG WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPY?
: The lucky one (Ben Folds Five)

14. WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? ...
: failing/ not being able to do what i want

15. ARE YOU A GIVER OR TAKER?
: more of a giver, but that can change too :-P

16. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
: lette

17. WHAT IS YOUR DAD'S MIDDLE NAME?
: Panes

18. MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED?
: March of the Penguins --- i LOVE this movie!

19. INVISIBLE FOR A DAY, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
: slap those who pissed me off silly :-P

20. STUCK ON A DESERT ISLAND & COULD HAVE ONLY ONE KIND OF FOOD FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
: uh, sh*t. di ako makaisip... an endless supply of power cereal and frozen blueberries!!!!

21. FAVORITE TV COMMERCIAL?
: right now, the COKE ad with Cindy Crawford... and the LEVI's jeans ad (with the easy like a sunday song)

22. IF YOU WERE DEAD AND YOUR SOUL WAS GIVEN A CHANCE TO STAY FOR ONE DAY WHAT WOULD YOU do?
: talk to my family and friends, and tell them just exactly what i feel about them

24. YOUR EYE COLOR?
: dark brown

25. WHAT ARE THE THINGS YOU ALWAYS BRING?
: cellphone, change, MUNI/BART pass, ID, lipgloss, postcards and stamps

26. WHAT DID YOU WANNA BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID?
: a ballet dancer (haha, sobrang 80's!)

27. WHAT DO YOU USUALLY DO WHEN THE CLOCK TURNS 7 AM?
: sleep.

28. THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEET?
: right now, dark green

29. WHO YOU WANT TO MEET?
: new interesting people

30. HOW'S LIFE TODAY?
: interesting so far... just woke up eh

Take me out to the Ball game...

classic!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Went to the ballpark tonight to watch my first ball game, at THE SBC ballpark, famed to be one of the best, if not the best, ball parks in the West Coast. I was not disappointed -- this place is pretty amazing! Watched the SF Giants versus the New York Mets. Pretty fun night, albeit the slow play... just lovely :-D

The Palace of Fine Arts, SF at night

The Palace of Fine Arts at night
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

This makes sneaking in around at night worth it.

PSEUDO-RELATIONSHIPS (thanks, GeeJ)

Pseudo-boyfriends.

Pseudo-girlfriends.

Flings.

Almost like a relationship, but not quite.

It is a phase where the persons involved
are more than friends, but not quite lovers.

Puwedeng may verbal agreement,
puwedeng wala.

One or both of you may have admitted your
feelings,possible ding hindi.

You just let your gestures do the talking for
you.

Walang pormal na ligawan na nangyari.

Hindi kayo mag-dyowa.

Pero sa kilos niyo,
sa mga sinasabi niyo,
parang kayo,pero hindi.

This kind of "relationship"
can happen at different stages
for different reasons.

It can happen after a break-up.

You still love each other,
and you want to be with each other
but you broke up for a reason.

And for reasons that you alone know,
ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan.

It can also happen before a relationship,
iyong pareho kayong nakikiramdam.

Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag-
seryoso kaya kunwa-kunwarian lang muna.

Testing lang. (tama ba un?!)

Puwede ring hindi puwedeng maging kayo
kasi isa sa inyo may ka-relasyon na.

Kaya habang hindi pa siya
nakikipag-break doon sa boy/girl
(sabi niya makikipag-break siya soon
pero di naman niya ginagawa),
wala muna kayong relasyon
para nga naman hindi siya nangangaliwa
kasi "hindi naman kayo."

This pseudo-relationship stage,
for a time, can be fun.

Lalo na kung naghahanap
ka lang naman ng "KALARO."

Pero huwag ka lang mag-e-expect
na may patutunguhan kayo kze
wala talagang kasiguraduhan.

So bakit ang daming nagse-settle
sa ganitong set up ganoong
hindi naman sigurado
kung may patutunguhan?

Iba't ibang dahilan.

Puwedeng for fun lang.

Puwedeng "buti na iyan kesa wala" or
puwede na iyang "pantawid-gutom."

Meaning, habang wala pa iyong the real
thing,
doon muna sa kunwa-kunwarian.

For those who are not in a serious
relationship,
they would think that pseudo-relationship
is better than no relationship at all.

It would be fun, if all you're after
is that "kilig" feeling.

But then I learned that although it was
only a pseudo-relationship,
the emotions were real.

And usually, in this kind of set up,
merong malulugi..

"ung nainlove sa taong taken na.."

Una, you can't ask him/her to commit.

Since it's not really a relationship,
you can't demand commitment from your
partner.

Ano ba kayo?

You will always be uncertain
about your role in his/her life.

You can't expect him/her
to be always there with you.

And if you feel jealous of the other boys/girls,
you just have to keep it to yourself.

Ano ka ba niya para magselos?

Pangalawa, what if
you fall deeply in love with him/her?

You can't be sure if he/she feels the same
way.

Baka nag-a-assume ka lang
na mahal ka rin niya.

Even if you are dying
to tell him/her you love him/her,
you can't.

Because you're not sure
if he/she will like it.

Baka mapahiya ka lang.

This stage will always make you wonder
where you are in the relationship.

Or if there is a relationship at all.

Pangatlo, what if you become attached too
much?

What if you have invested
all your emotions and this man/woman
hasn't?

What if you remain faithful to him/her,
not entertaining other guys/gals,
only to find out that he/she is seeing
other girls/boys?

Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships,
it is fleeting.

When a disagreement sets in,
or when one of you gets cold,
then that would be the end of it.

Unlike in a serious relationship,
hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar
sa isang pseudo-relationship.

Wala kang pinanghahawakan.

Kasi sa pseudo- relationship,

there is no "us."

Meron lang "you and me,"

hindi "us"....


*sigh* what a reality bite.

the countdown begins...

Ok, ok, so i'll be heading back to the sunnier part of California five days from now, so i though to myself, what else haven't i done in SF? :-P Money matters aside, i do wanna check out some more of the more interesting sites in the city ...

So here's a random checklist in my head:

- check out the SF MOMA (this was in my list for the longest time!)
- watch a baseball game in the famed SBC park
- shop (?) --- well, window shop i guess! :-P in Castro and Haight
- check out the Palace of Fine Arts on a GOOD day (as in, no FOG!!!)
- hang with some more friends from PI who are here...
- watch The Skyflakes perform! (well, hopefully...)

+ + +

Anyhoo, i recently satisfied my Pinoy food craving with some pieces of chicken at Max's --- yes, my aunt and I went to El Camino to have some good ol' pinoy chicken at Max's. Yup, i am sooo happy there's a Max's in the area! The place was reminiscent of the Katipunan outlet (newly renovated look, and lotsa pinoy attendants, made me feel right at home...) and the guy helping us out was from the same province which was pretty surreal... :-) Anyhoo, we had chicken (served with bread and butter, which was weird) and my aunts had an extra order of bulalo soup, as well as the bihon guisado. Haaay, i missed it so much! I wonder if there's a Max's at Chicago... hmmm...

wishing, part deux

ok, after wishing i could teleport, i got into thinking (some more). Teleporting seems to be too trivial, why not wish for super powers instead? It will be so much better to defy gravity, or be able to change into something - or someone - altogether now, wouldn't it? Ok, i know this is really too kiddy, but hell, i'd want one (yeah, shows my "maturity", doesn't it? :-P )...

So what's YOUR super power?

+ + +

On a more "real" note, i would want to wish for a better opportunity to learn (hah!) ... I've been reading up on these great colleges here in the US and converting expenses to pesos, that's a hell lot of money just for a freakin' semester... the again, i guess good education can cost you some. I wish that some rich generous relative will give me the money to get some education while i'm here (thereby giving more time) and give me the chance to learn something otehr than the programs i already know. *sigh* Oh well.

+ + +

boba tea, anyone?

boba tea?
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

I went to Chinatown and all i got was this lousy boba tea... :-P

i wish i can teleport.

Seriously.

My aunt told me that once you get around San Francisco, you would wanna be somewhere else... on my part, that is sooo true. It sucks to be in SF when you have no money to spend, or anybody to hang out with (that's worth your time, anyway). These days i seem to be wallowing too much into this pit of self-assessment (it isn't bringing any good results) that is matching with the darn weather. Argh.

My friend and I were talking abotu teleporting a few days ago, and yes, i would like one of those! Can you just imagine it? Everybody will be able to go anywhere in the world at an instant, frequent flyer miles and skyhigh tickets will be a thing of the past, and yes, all you will need is a teleporter card and a "shoot" or a spot. Gone will be the "LDR (long distance relationship) syndrome", and everybody will be happy. Plus, you eliminate the world of social or financial strata, because it will be available to everybody. oh joy!

I'm am having a big case of wanderlust again. Maybe i just need to get some fresh air...

saturday night in pictures...

the gang's all here!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

i'm tired of typing so here's what my cousins and i have been doing so far...

the gals --- Joan and Rose

the gals --- Joan and Rose
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

yeah, we're all that!

yeah, we're all that!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

me and cuzin bobby

me and cuzin bobby
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

aha!

Allison and me!

Allison and me!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Allison had her 5th birthday bash at Lake Merced today...she's now 5 years old! kewlness...ain't she the cutest thing!?!

yesterday...

Drat, darn and desperation. Where was i when all the excitement was happening? yesterday there was an explosion in the financial district, the same building my cousin Ray and I were checking out (Ralph Lauren store)...i mean, i know it's stupid to actually wish you were in the scene of the explosion, but this was, after all, San Francisco! We were there, but not in that specific area, so yeah, there was quite a bit of pandemonium.. :-P I'm just glad that only a few people were hurt, considering this IS, after all, one of the touristy spots in town (yep, mega-shopping district!)

+ + +

Finally checked out the Coffee Bean outlet in Fillmore. The place is smaller than the outlets i'm used to, but hey, i got myself the new Pink Card, which is pretty kewl :-D Had the large Mocha Latte --- it;s great, especially on a windy chilly afternoon! Of course, i had to top if off with some yummy gelato at Tango Gelato (hahahah!). I know, i know, i complain that it's cold here, but hell, i've been eating ice cream non-stop... i blame it on my cousin Bobby who for the life of me, had to point out the ice cream places that i just "had to try out" while i'm here. So long, diet! :-P

+ + +

Anyhoo, my cousins and i decided to put my CA ID to the test and check out the bars. We headed up to Mitchell's for another round of ice cream before we went to the bars... shoot, i forgot which street we were on! :-P We got into this bar called The Holy Cow which was filled to the brim with people, complete with gyrating bodies up on the ledge. Hmmm, the songs were pretty mixed, no cover charge but helluva expensive place for drinks :-P The songs were good though, lotsa 80's songs you can't help but dance to... good crowd cosnidering it was a saturday night! :-P

+ + +

let her eat cake!

let her eat cake!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Tita Indang celebrated her "fake" birthday today, and we got treated to a fab dinner at Macaroni Grill. Lucky her, she gets to have two birthdays in a year! :-P

the cousins

the cousins
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

we're just here to eat. actually (hehe)

the happy couple

the happy couple
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

tita indang is blooming!

untitled

The breeze was chilly, as most days were. I walked along the sand, trudging as i struggled not to fall. It was a cold day. As always.

The wind hit my face repeatedly, but i didn't notice it much. My face had become numb with the cold, as the rest of my body was becoming slowly. I was entranced by the view. The ocean, the beach... it was cloudy, gray and overcast. It was lovely.

I felt the loneliness like a warm hug, and i smile wistfully.

meme!!!

Got this from potatoesinthemist, thanks! it's pretty fun...and yes, like her, i LOVE surveys (when i'm bored anyway)...

Were you named for anyone? After my lola, my lolo calls her honey. :-)
Do you wish on stars? yeah, sometimes...
When did you last cry? recently.
Do you like your handwriting?right now? no. it's a scribble...
What's your favorite lunch meat? I'm pesco-vegetarian, but recently i allowed myself chicken
What is your most embarrassing CD? hmmm... some bootleg copy of Mariah Carey (i have no idea why...)
If you were another person, would you be friends with you?yes
Do you have a journal? yes, this blog plus a paper journal...plus some more stuff
Do you use sarcasm a lot? when i am not comfortable with the scenario i'm in
What are your nicknames?lette to my friends, honey to special people...
Would you bungee jump? yes!
Do you untie your shoes before you take them off?sometimes
Do you think that you are strong? i'dlike to think i am... but then again, it's all relative.
What is your favorite ice cream flavor? chocolate or espresso ( i miss Mallard's ice cream!)
Shoe size? 6-7
Red or pink? Hot pink! or screaming RED
What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I am competitive (a little too much)
What do you miss most? It's a matter of who, i think...
Do you want everyone you send this to, to send it back? I'm posting it, so it would be nice to have someone reply to this...
What color pants/shoes are you wearing? I'm naked right now, so it doesnt count :-P
What are you listening to right now?the sound of silence
Last thing you ate? cereal and milk (yummy!)
If you were a crayon, what color would you be? silver (it's special, like me! hehehe)
What is the weather like right now? cloudy, chilly
Last person you talked to on the phone? my aunt
The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? eyes, smile!
Favorite drink? margaritas, coffee


Favorite sport? softball, though i don't play so much anymore..
Hair color? black
Eye color? dark brown
Do you wear contacts? yes
Favorite food? hmmm..italian?
Last movie you watched? March of the Penguins!! I love that movie!
Favorite day of the year? birthday...and halloween! (they're close to each other)
Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings.... cheesy noh?
Winter or summer? summer. I love the summer specials and yes, i get cold easily...
What is your favorite dessert? reese's cups and/or ice cream....yummy!
Who is most likely to do this meme? Whoever wants to
Who is the least likely to do this meme and comment? Someone who doesn't see it.
What books are you reading? hmmm...no books for me now, i'm kinda tired of reading.
What's on your mouse pad? I don't have one. I use a laptop (PowerBook G4).
What did you watch on TV last night? the news... i dont get tv that much these days...

Favorite smells? anything citrusy, muh baby! :-)
Favorite sound? good music, muh baby's voice
Rolling Stones or Beatles? beatles
What's the furthest you've been from your home? the US
Do you have a special talent? yes, but i won't tell you :-P
What is your ring tone? standard ringtone

with Ray riding the MUNI

with Ray riding the MUNI
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Yesterday i finally got to Downtown via the MUNI, san Fran's cool transpo train which pretty much travels to anywhere in the city. It's much mor eefficient than the LA transit, and definitely a bit more pricey :-P They don't have day passes (too bad) but their bus/train tranfer is pretty good (the ticket's good for two hours or so), so you can definitely ride for a while if you want to :-)

Lunchin' (a.k.a., how shopping takes care of depression)

I woke up to the cloudy, cold day in SF... the day was starting slowly as i leisurely made myself a cup of joe and munched on fruit. I miss having frozen blueberries and cereal... i'm adapting to the weather, so sue me :-P Anyway, after some mail check and tv time, i managed to confirm lunch with Theo, a friend who was here for a few days before heading back to Hawaii. Decided to do some errands, so Ray and I headed off to the mailbox about two blocks from the house, after which we looked around the shopping center nearby. It's a cool, breezy walk, with the drizzle of rain adding to the fun :-P

Theo dropped by to pick me up around 1ish, and we headed to CrepeVine in 9th ave., a quaint cafe which featured a cook still working there whom Theo knew from waaay back (like, when he was still living in the area). The food was great, as i ordered a salad and sandwich (i seem to be having that these days...hmmm) . Theo and I caught up with what's been happening, about future plans of travelling, what he and i have been up to recently, and the many adventures so far. It's so kewl to see him again! We headed off to Amoeba music, where he stocked up on his music staples (he calls it "educational material", hehehe) and i checked out the SF outlet of this oh-so-fine music store (Tower Records, goodbye!). We ddecided to head off and check out the Haight-Ashbury area, this bohemian/kitschy street which featured lotsa cool stores, great hats and shoes, as well as the artsy stuff you normally couldn't see anywhere. Thing was though, it reminded me so much of Melrose Avenue, for some reason... we checked out Giant Robot, this cool store which, according to Theo, was an offspring from a really popular design/art magazine. It's got all the cutesy kewl stuff i was collecting in Manila, like tofu heads and kubrick toys! :-D tee-hee.... too bad they don't have gloomy bears tho... I spent on postcards and some really fun keychains :-D ay, naku.... i'm buying my sadness away, i think , hehehe :-P Anyhoo, i had fun checking out the area!

As part of my origihnal plan for the day, i looked around for a hat i can use while i'm here in SF (it's just fun, ok? Besides, i forgot to bring my hat...) Either the hats there were too crappy, or too darn expensive :-( Anyhoo, after that pleasant aftrnoon, Theo dropped me off downtown Old Navy to meet up with my cousin Bobby. With that priority in mind, Bobby and i toured the "touristy" shops of downtown to find the perfect fit and ended up ---you guessed it --- back in Old Navy! :-) Check out the cool hat i got! It's pretty neat... I didn't get to buy my gloves though (too bad!) but then again, there's always a next time... :-P

On the bright side, i got to ride the train for the first time today! :-) Bobby and i took the MUNI back to his car, parked somewhere nearby Inner Sunset, so i finally got to try it out. It's kewl and yes, it is better than the LA transit! It's like riding the metro, only it's more consistent and yes, it travels to more places :-) Kewlness...I think i'm gonna try that again tom...

I dunno. Depressiona nd dealing with this whole adjustment thing gets to me easily, more so these days. I guess that aside from my immediate family here, i know no one. I guess this time alone gives me more space and time to just think. and think. and think some more. *sigh* I know, i know, i should really stop this torture. I know that whatever happens, the feeling will be there. I trust him. I trust myself. I just... miss him. I hope he misses me too.

I left my heart in...

I'm sleepless once again. It's late, but who cares? Hearing his voice tonight was a blam to my restlessness. I miss him more, but i am so glad to hear him speak, even for a little while. The day was good, don't get me wrong --- the company is great, the sights are amazing, but i guess i am lonely. I miss a lot of things. I miss familiarity. I miss my friends. I miss him.

I can't sleep. I keep thinking about life too much. I'm thinking waay too much into the future. I keep thinking about the what-ifs, the hopeful maybes and the risky yes-es our lives will face up. I feel selfish, thinking about it too much, and wishing so much...

The clock ticks oh so slowly. My eyes water, perhaps from tiredness, perhaps from sadness. I pore over the images, numbing myself as much as i can from the depression that is slowly enveloping my state of mind... i need a drag. bad.

posin'

posin'
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

here's me and my cousins at pier 39 --- eh?

self-portrait?

self-portrait?
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

at Pier 39 earlier, with cousins Bobby and Ray --- do i look like i had enough sleep?:-P That's what people say with this pic anyway. Anyhoo, we had fun hangin' and doing the "touristy thing" :-)

cd album cover!!!

cd album cover!!!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

this pic of us (ray, me and Bobby) looks more like an album cover :-P heheheh

ghirardelli's with cousin Bobby!

ghirardelli's with cousin Bobby!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

I'm in Chocolate heaven!!! My love for Ghirardelli's has been given its ultimate reward --- we hung out last night at the GHIRARDELLI SQUARE, where we sampled the heavenly sundae delights and checked out the HUGE factory/cafe of them chocolates. Yummy!!! My fave? Always and forever will be the dark chocolate --- a close second? chocolate and mint :-)

i scream, i scream, we all scream for...

i scream, i scream, we all scream for...
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

ICE CREAM!!!

Arriving at San Francisco, my cousin Bobby took me to Mitchell's this well-known nook which featured a lot of tropical flavors and darn good ice cream (nothing like Mallard's, tho) --- We were like ice creamholics, huddling in the back alley, eating our double scoop mint chocolate pie ices in the windy cold day... tee-hee!

Breakfast at El Diablo's

breakfast pic!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

On my last day in Seattle, i had a lovely breakfast with muh sweetie at El Diablo coffee co., this quaint cafe by Queen Anne Ave. (Notice the rad new specs my baby is wearing!) :-) I miss you hun!

Creeping into my consciousness, part deux

You sneak up on me
infusing me with memories
i'd rather not think about right now
My cheeks are heated
my breath caught
in my giddiness
of remembering

I cannot remember when it was last
that i did not think of you

You sneak up on me
with fragments of what was done
what was said, what was not
little clues you left
with your image burned into my brain
they remind me to call you
even though i know i shouldn't

I cannot remember when it was last
that i did not miss you

You sneak up on me
with the songs we listened to
With Beck languidly played in the background
its wistful voice telling us of the inevitable
i remember with a gentle smile
how we swayed gracefully with a song of love
which sang a million heartaches
in silence we held each other
to the end

I cannot remember when it was last
that i did not love you...

bwahahhahahah!

for those who are reading, well. tough luck, kiddos.

:-P

Asking myself what...

So we've been hangin' out, having family dinners, getting to know the friends and family, as well as checked out the fab sights (crabbin' at the Bay, beer sampling at the brewery, farm marketing, fishing at the Lake, berry-picking at the farms) and well, generally taking in each other's company without all the questions of the future. His family is just wonderful, his friends are so fun, and him? well, i can't ask for a better guy :-) (sheesh, mushy me. argh...)

I find myself asking all those questions though, like how far can i give myself for this guy, will this last, how will this end, and all that jazz. It scares the shit out of me how this will end. It's the present, i constantly tell myself, that really matters right now. Live the life, and well, hope for the best. I have never been so scared in my life...

Tonight i finally get to speak to him like it was yesterday. The truth in his eyes was all i need to know that yes, he feels the same way, and yes, even though it is so far away and so remotely not in sight, he hopes the same for us as i do. Wishful thinking? perhaps. But i love him and he is mine, even if it's just for now. I love him with his simple smile, and his fervent need to know that i am ok, that i will be all right, that things will work out, somehow. I love him in my dreams, i love him in the now, i love him into whatever may come...

:-) God, please let me survive Friday with a steady smile and a hopeful future

car_pic_Naman!

car_pic_Naman!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

whoo-hoo! cruisin' down the 210 on the way to Pasadena :-)

Imperial_station at the Blue line

Imperial_station at the Blue line
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

commuting in action! here's moi doing the touristy thing and having my pic taken at the intersection of the green andblue train lines...o, keri ko naman a!

the gurls!

the gurls!
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Momento pic of abs, me and river before i leave for San Francisco! Yep, ill be travelling to SF to check out the scene (for about a month) and try muy luck in the bright, exciting industries SF has to offer. KUdos to these lovely ladies for being such great company, and well, fabulous girls in their own right! I'm gonna miss ya in SF! see ya in a month;s time, ayt? mwah!

Fine... whatever!

WORDS WOMEN USE
******************************


FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument
when they are right and you
need to shut up.


FIVE MINUTES
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five
minutes is only five
minutes if you have just been given 5 more
minutes to watch the
game before helping around the house.


NOTHING
This is the calm before the storm. This
means "something," and you should be
on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing'
usually end in "Fine"

GO AHEAD
This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal
statement often
misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she
thinks you are an idiot
and wonders why she is wasting her time standing
here and arguing with
you over "Nothing"


THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that
a woman can make to
a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to
think long and hard
before deciding how and when you will pay for your
mistake.


THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or
faint. Just say you're
welcome.
Send this to the men you know to warn them
about future arguments they
can avoid if they remember the terminology!
And send it to your women friends to give them a
good laugh!
They forgot "Whatever"...(it's a woman's way of
saying *!#@ YOU!)

Caramel

It won't do
to dream of caramel,
to think of cinnamon
and long for you.

It won't do
to stir a deep desire,
to fan a hidden fire
that can never burn true.

I know your name,
I know your skin,
I know the way
these things begin;

But I don't know
how I would live with myself,
what I'd forgive of myself
if you don't go.

So goodbye,
sweet appetite,
no single bite
could satisfy...

I know your name,
I know your skin,
I know the way
these things begin;

But I don't know
what I would give of myself,
how I would live with myself
if you don't go.

It won't do
to dream of caramel,
to think of cinnamon
and long
for you.

- Caramel/suzanne Vega